Several weeks ago in our bishopric meeting, the topic of Mother’s Day came up and what we should have as topics for the Sacrament talks. A counsellor recommended the usual honoring our mothers and the great women of the church. They were approved in second with no discussion.

As someone who has a strong interest in women studies (I plan to include women studies when I start my graduate degree next year), this bothered me, and I stewed about it all night. It bothered me mostly because I don’t think the topic of women should be so quickly overlooked. Women are so complex, so it makes no sense to dedicate a meeting to the same two topics every year, especially when so many women had absentee mothers or had abusive mothers or who aren’t mothers themselves.

Never mind the fact that Mother’s Day should be celebrated by the children of a mother; I don’t believe it should be institutional.

Anyhow, I decided to submit alternative topics for that Sunday:

• How Mary as a mother had an influence on Jesus
• Women of the Old Testament as types of the Saviour
• The influence women had in the 19th century church
• How the gospel of Jesus Christ empowers women to be leaders in society
• The female disciples of Christ
• The role of prophetesses in the Bible
• How believing in a Heavenly Mother makes us better people

I thought they were topics rarely discussed, so they could be a welcome change and allow us a ward to explore different aspects of womanhood and/or motherhood.

I have had lots of Bishops in my life. Most of them have been your usual, garden-variety church leaders. I’ve always had white, middle-aged guys as my Bishop. I think having an African-American or some other minority as Bishop would be cool. That could take a while. Iowa isn’t known for its racial diversity. In the meantime, I want to tell you about the most interesting Bishops I’ve had. Read more »

For women’s hearts, lilacs from my yard and a couple of cute stories I found in my journal the other day.

Read more »

There is a fantastic scene in the final installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy when the wizard Gandalf comes face-to-face with a Nazgul (the Witch King of Agnmar), who has been terrorizing the city of Gondor. He raises his staff to challenge the Nazgul. The Witch King throws off his cloak to expose his crown of fear and raises his sword of flame. With the barest of effort the Witch King shatters Gandalf’s staff.

Gandalf is taken aback, momentarily stunned. He has wielded his staff to thwart much evil and destruction, it is the repository of much power. But it fails him here. What will he do next? Will he just crumple up and die, as the Witch King says he is about to?

No, he doesn’t. Taking advantage of the arrival of the cavalry from Rohan, Gandalf gets up and continues to rally the citizens of Gondor to the defense of their city, exhorting them to hold strong in the defense of their city, even in the face of a terrifying and merciless assault.
Read more »

Perhaps you don’t remember me well enough in the bloggernaccle to recall that I am politically liberal. I am. Very. And I just want to be up front about that.

There have been a number of political stories this week that will last longer and almost all of them are more important, but the story that caught me this week was the one about Mitt Romney reportedly bullying a classmate in high school by cutting off his long hair. I know! So Amish! Read more »

My initial reaction (I was livid!):

Alright I’m gonna say it. I’m disgusted by the cover on Time Magazine. “Are you Mom enough?” That’s insulting to the rest of us who tried to breast feed and either couldn’t because mentally we couldn’t handle it or we just couldn’t make enough!

I tried my best and I wasn’t able to enjoy my son with the constant worrying about breast feeding, keeping my milk supply up, drinking enough water, what meds to take to make more milk, was he getting enough–am I doing it right?–and then finally coming to the depressing result of not being FIT enough or “Mom enough” to feed him. I was heartbroken. Read more »

From the archive, the first post ever at Mormon Mentality, an examination of the poetic structure of Where the Wild Things Are!

Last week, I’d gone to the Social Security Administration offices to get some information on my father. Surprisinggly, I was the only person there for awhile. Then, as I was waiting for Bill to come pick me up (we were in St. George with only one car), a teenage girl came in with her mother, followed by an older couple. Read more »

I have a dear friend who is a student of the gospel. She regularly logs onto BYU.edu and LDS.org and reads talks recorded on those sites, finding the gems that she then recommends to her slacker friends like me. I appreciate her ongoing efforts to lift me and others to a higher plane of thinking.

Sometimes I don’t take her good recommendations as quickly as would be prudent. It isn’t that I don’t believe her opinions, she has never steered me wrong. It is just that I get busy with other meaningless projects that fill my time. Read more »

Years ago I was asked half-heartedly by my Bishop if I would give a Sacrament Meeting talk on Mother’s Day. I immediately responded without hesitation, “Heck no! I wouldn’t touch that with a 10 foot pole!” He mumbled something about how difficult it was to find someone willing to speak on the subject of Motherhood for Mother’s Day. I was reminded again how grateful I am to never have to be a Bishop. What a miserable job. Almost as bad as being a Mother. Read more »

Recently we went to a Castle in Wales (another story) and in the moat was a family of ducks – a mother and 11 babies that were clearly newly hatched. We watched while they swam over to this grate, where the water drained into a culvert that ran under the road into who knows where. We were horrified as one by one the ducklings got sucked down the grate. The mother did not seem particularly bothered by it and started to swim away. Only four babies followed her. I ran down to peek in the culvert and could see several of the babies were alive and trying to keep from being washed away. Unfortunately, they were 6-8 feet down and I could not reach them, nor could we move the grate as it was welded on. So we had to walk away knowing those baby ducks would die. What was even more disturbing was the mother duck. She swam over to the side and started eating with the four babies. It has bothered me ever since. I think what is even more disturbing is that I have read stories of humans who are not much different. However, on a happy note, most human parents do not act like this so enjoy those Mother’s on Mother’s Day and always remember to help out those baby ducklings you encounter in life.

Princess Buttgold was so doted on that she was sometimes difficult, although most of the time she was sweet and charming. But she had a weird kind of jealousy where if I complimented one of her friends, she’d say “oh, so I’m not?” or, “oh, so you love her and not me?” It drove me crazy.

A few days ago I criticized an article about Romney’s job as bishop that someone had posted in facebook and the person who posted it asked me something like “don’t you think they do this to Obama, too?” And I thought of Sarah’s fractured logic. Read more »

I ordered this book because it popped up while I was ordering Joanna Brooks’ book. I’m so glad I did. I devoured it, feeling much the same elation as I did when I found Times and Seasons. These twenty authors (compiled by Robert A. Rees, published by Signature Books) speak my language.

As I read, I was struck by recurring themes that I want to share with you (this review might be continued): Read more »

In the April General Conference, President Uchdorf spoke about forgiveness. He reminded listeners of the need to forgive as Christ taught, “Forgive one another, for he that forgiveth not…(stands) condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.”

He also noted the common trap people make when it comes to the idea of forgiveness. “We make exceptions when it comes to own bitterness because we feel that, in our case, we have all the information we need to hold someone else in contempt.” Of course. When I am upset, it is righteous anger. When you are upset, you are unreasonable. You might even need anger management therapy.

President Uchodorf gave two suggestions on how to not judge others and forgiving. The first suggestion made me smile. Stop it. “When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following: Stop it!” I have always been a fan of simple solutions. Read more »

In the February 2010 Liahona President Thomas S. Monson had this to say about patriarchal blessings:

“Your patriarchal blessing is yours and yours alone. It may be brief or lengthy, simple or profound. Length and language do not a patriarchal blessing make. It is the Spirit that conveys the true meaning. Your blessing is not to be folded neatly and tucked away. It is not to be framed or published. Rather, it is to be read. It is to be loved. It is to be followed. Your patriarchal blessing will see you through the darkest night. It will guide you through life’s dangers. … Your patriarchal blessing is to you a personal Liahona to chart your course and guide your way. …” Read more »

When my husband and I were married college students with children, we took advantage of a little-known federal mortgage program that gave housing loans to low-income families. The goal was to keep rural towns alive at a time when people were fleeing the country to find jobs in the city. That is how we ended up in Windsor, Colorado and became friends with the most interesting older person we have ever met.

The older part is important because up until that time, we had no personal experience with anyone in retirement beyond grandparents and extended family. The crucial distinction is that with family, we knew their life stories but they knew little of our daily lives. Twenty-something kids just don’t have much in common with old folks. Or so we thought.

Forest “Stoney” Stonemets introduced himself at church shortly after we moved into our first house. He was average height, 5’9ish, with a full head of white hair and blue watery eyes that age sometimes brings. Wearing his Sunday suit it was impossible to detect his well-developed arm and leg muscles, born of years of hard work. He was chatty and curious, asking questions of us that signaled more than passing politeness. Read more »

We are pleased to announce that Sunshine is joining Mormon Mentality! We welcome her insight and chutzpah and know you’ll enjoy her posts.

Sunshine is a happily married mother of four children, ages 2 through almost-12, who also works as a midwife. She enjoys the wondrous process of helping to bring life into the world and has had all her children at home, so she is able to relate to those young mothers who want a natural home birth. A lifelong Mormon, she has an avid curiousity and an open mind that allows for life’s circumstances that don’t fit into the cookie cutter mold.

Sunshine has worked her butt off in the Young Womens program and is now working in the nursery of her ward. She’s looking forward to adding Mormon Mentality to her to-do list. Whenever I see her posts or comments, I think “Good Morning, Merry Sunshine!” She’d probably think that was hokey, but it makes me feel good.

I don’t think we realize how different our faith is between generations until we’re staring straight at it, and even then we’re searching for the familiarities of our own. Read more »

This morning as I watched the morning news shows, I was dismayed to hear that President Obama ate dog as a child. Not dismayed that he did it, but dismayed to hear about it. For crying out loud. American politics is/are (?) the stupidest of human events.

We have dogs and love them. They’re part of our family. Dogs have funny personalities—ours do anyway. Our first family dog was Emily, a white Chihuaha mix, whose loyalty to James can’t be overstated. We got her when the vet, who lived a couple of houses away, sent her to our house with four little boys, who said “Doc says he’s going to put her to sleep if you don’t give her a home.” She was worth it, quiet and sweet. Read more »

Since I have become a member of the blogging world I have read many articles pertaining to modesty. Being raised in the church I was taught the belief that modesty starts at a young age. Beliefs like not allowing your 3 year old wear a sleeveless dress because she will, most assuredly, grow up to be a slut, or worse get pregnant. I bought into those beliefs and for the most part bought clothing that I felt or was taught was modest. Through the years I’ve come to understand that modesty isn’t ‘just’ about the clothing. Tracy M, a very popular blogger, wrote a most exceptional piece on modesty. I loved it and it opened my eyes as to what I was missing, and how I wasn’t including a persons actions to be modest. That post helped me let go of all the old beliefs about modesty and helped me embrace all my new ones.
Read more »