Thank you, friends, for your responses to our post on Susan Schmidt, who was the fifth wife of polygamist Verlan LeBaron. Susan is the author of the book “His Favorite Wife” about her marriage at the age of 15 and subsequent experiences as part of the LeBaron clan.

Thank you, Susan, for taking the time to answer our questions.

Q1: How did you return to religion after being so deeply disillusioned by the one that you grew up knowing? (DKL)

A1: When I first left Colonia LeBaron, I felt as though I’d been released from bondage. I was 24 and had five children, but I went to dances, flirted, dated- all the things I’d mostly missed out on as a teenager. It didn’t take long though, before I started missing spirituality in my life. I wanted my children to have a spiritual upbringing, and I was very confused. I’d been taught in Colonia LeBaron, of course, that the LDS church was off track, but that other churches were an abomination in the sight of God. So for a time I took my children to a local ward.

Q2: Did you grow up in a polygamous family? What were your expectations of married life like? How did those expectations contrast to the reality?

Looking back, how would you compare the pro-sides of polygamy and monogamy? And the con-sides?

(If there aren’t any pro-sides, this question can be skipped. I don’t like to assume that everyone who was polygamous hated it, though your leaving it certainly argues for that, but I don’t want to rub salt in your wounds if it was bad. I haven’t read your book so I don’t know.)(PDOE)

A2: My Mom and Dad moved us to Mexico to join the LeBaron church when I was six years old, so basically this was the only life I remember. It seemed normal to me to live in a small adobe house, to read by the light of a kerosene lamp, to haul water from a well, and to do laundry on a scrub board. My father had taken a plural wife, my “Mama Maria.” I helped with the care of my half-siblings. Everyone in the colony lived polygamy, and I’d been taught that I had to do so too. I had to marry a righteous man of the priesthood who would take me to the celestial kingdom, so the older, married men who had proved themselves worthy would be the far better choice. We were soldiers in God’s kingdom, and I romanticized as a teenager being a perfectly supportive wife for my husband and getting along well with his other wives. It didn’t occur to me as a 15 yr. old bride that I would ever feel jealousy in my marriage. The reality, once I became my husband’s sixth wife and he moved me away from my family and friends to another location in Baja California, was loneliness, jealousy, the reality that I was only a child and missed my Mama, and poverty like I’d never known before. Today, I truly believe there are no pro-sides to polygamy. Although I learned to care for some of my sister-wives and all 57 of my husband’s children, I realized these same relationships would have been available- with no down side- without sharing the man who should have been my soul-mate. It’s impossible to bond closely with a man who isn’t really “yours.” There are too many vying, gut-wrenching emotions. There is no security in such a relationship.

Q3. I would like to know what you are doing now from a spiritual perspective? What is your opinion of the LDS Church? (Devyn)

A3. I became a Born-again Christian after I married my second husband. I have found great joy and peace in believing and trusting in Jesus Christ alone for my salvation. I do believe the Mormon people are some of the most choice on earth.

Q4: Did you have a testimony of the LeBaron faith? Were you converted with your parents, or did you grow up in the faith? If it’s not too personal, I’d be very interested to hear your conversion and/or de-conversion stories. (Matt B)

A4: The testimony I had of the LeBaron faith was a testimony based on feelings and the opinions of my leaders, not on personal knowledge of the scriptures. Once I started studying the scriptures, I realized that all was not right in my world as I knew it. I’m sure that’s why the Bible encourages us to study out for ourselves the scriptures (John 5:39, Acts. 17:11, II Tim 2:15 Rom 10:1-4) and tells us not to lean on the arm of flesh. I’ve come to realize that the Word of God can be trusted, that He is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and that salvation is just what is stated in Romans 3:23 & 28 and Ephesians 2:8-9. A free gift. We don’t earn it. We will never be good enough- no matter how hard we try. God knew we were doomed. He loved us enough to pay the price. He redeemed us. It’s a free gift.

Q5: Do polygamist offshoots believe that the mainstream LDS Church secretly endorses what they do? If no, do they believe that it did in the past? What is the opinion of polygamists concerning the validity of the LDS Church? (ARJ)

A5. No, polygamists do not believe the LDS Church endorses what they do. They believe its members have given up their exaltation in turning away from polygamy — which Joseph Smith gave his life defending, proclaiming it as a revelation from God in D&C Section 132, where God revealed polygamy as “The new and everlasting covenant” stating: “all those who have this law revealed to them must obey the same or be damned.” The fundamentalist churches believe in the first revelation to Wilford Woodruff, the one prior to the manifesto that the Mormon Apostle Abraham H. Cannon recorded in his diary, which said:

During our meeting a revelation was read which President Woodruff received Sunday evening, Nov. 24th. Propositions had been made for the Church to make some concessions to the Courts in regard to its principles. Both of Pres. Woodruff’s counselors refused to advise him as to the course he should pursue, and he therefore laid the matter before the Lord. The answer came quick and strong. The Word of the Lord was for us not to yield one particle of that which he had revealed and established. He had done and would continue to care for His work and those of the Saints who were faithful. And we need have no fear of our enemies when we were in the line of our duty. We are promised redemption and deliverance if we will trust in God and not in the arm of flesh… The whole revelation was filled with words of the greatest encouragement and comfort, and my heart was filled with joy and peace during the entire reading. It sets all doubts at rest concerning the course to pursue.” (Journal of Abraham H. Cannon, under the date of Dec. 19, 1889.)

Please rest assured that in pointing this out, I absolutely do not endorse polygamy myself!!!

Q6: Were you sheltered from modern life growing up and is your life now a drastic contrast in lifestyle? (Barb)

A6: Polygamist communities do cloister their members. They do not encourage their women to read the scriptures, as knowledge is power. Yes, my life today is drastically contrasted from my life in polygamy. I am very happily married to a husband of my own, who loves me, cares for me, respects me, and allows me to be a full partner in our marriage. We have a wonderful life with four of our seven grown children (11 grandchildren) living around us. Each one has a personal relationship with God, and is an asset to the communities in which they live. My girls are both climbing corporate ladders and loving every minute of it.

Q7 – How did you get the courage to write a book? What do you plan to do next? (Stephen)

A7. I wrote this book for two reasons. First, because I wanted to raise awareness about what actually goes on in polygamous communities, how the brainwashing and abuse happens, etc. And second, because I wanted to give hope to women caught in polygamy, that there is another way, a better way, and if I could get out with my five children and discover true joy, they can. As to what I plan to do next: This is a self-published book and as such, it takes lots and lots of work to promote it. I have had scads of supportive comments about the book that assures me it is speaking to people’s hearts. My desire and prayer is that it continues to do so and becomes a World-Wide success. At present, we are in negotiations with a major film company from New York who plan to make a TV miniseries based on the book. YAY!!

Q8: I’m curious what Susan’s children are up to, have they remained in polygamous faiths, or have they left faith altogether?

Also, I’m curious what you thought of Under the Banner of Heaven if you’ve read it?

And have you seen BIG LOVE on HBO, and if so, what do you think of its portrayal of a polygamous lifestyle? (Brian G.)

A8. Yes, I read Under the Banner of Heaven and thought it was excellent! Krakauer’s info was right on. And yes I’ve seen a few episodes of Big Love and hated it. It’s a far cry from the polygamy I knew.

Q9: I’ll be honest and say that the LeBarons scare the hell out of me. Did you ever feel your life was in danger? How did you develop the courage to leave? (Mark IV)

A9: Please read my book, Mark. You need to see that there were two branches of LeBarons. The “Ervilites” (Ervil LeBaron’s group) were scary and evil. Joel LeBaron (our prophet) on the other hand, was a kind and loving man, who truly desired to serve the Lord and truly believed he was God’s anointed, was appalled and heartsick by what his brother Ervil was doing. Both of these men were brothers to my husband, Verlan. Yes, my life as well as the lives of all the “Joelites” was in danger. I left because of many reasons. Please read in the Book of Mormon Jacob 1:15, Jacob 3:5-6, Mosiah 11: 1-2, Ether 10:5, and D&C 49:15-16. Look at these scriptures and you will understand why, coupled with my husband marrying more and more women, I escaped.