It seems to be all around us. On a thread over at FMH, commenter Quimby mentions her desire as a young woman to be told “It’s okay to want it all. You are not less of a feminist for wanting to get married and have children.”

On the popular TV sitcom “How I Met Your Mother,” the character Victoria agonizes over whether or not to accept a two-year fellowship in Germany. She’s two months into a relationship with a man she thinks may be The One but worries it would be “unfeminist” to pass up this career opportunity for a guy.

Feminism has done great things for women; I won’t deny it. However, this creeping thread has wound its way into the collective unconscious: is my choice a “feminist choice?” Can I call myself a good feminist if I do “X” or “Y?”

Um, I’m kind of confused here. I thought the point of feminism was a woman’s right to make her own decisions in life, whatever they may be. When did it become the standard by which a woman has to make her choices?