Sorry the comments were off–not sure why. Have at it!

This was a lot of fun to read. I agree with all of it, especially the part about naming the baby what you plan to call it.

And I’m feeling slightly abashed because I really love the name “Jack” for boys. The baby on Scrubs was named Jack. I wonder if there is a connection between that and its recent popularity, like I suspect there is for “Emma.”

Personally, I veer away from one-syllable names. They’re too much like nick-names and I’d want my kids to be able to chose how they present themselves to the world. “Jack” is good for friends and family but on that business card or resume it just looks like someone too young/casual to be serious. I like to give kids lots of options.

Plus it made for a great indicator of how mad my mom was when I was growing up. Nickname? No prob. Official version of name? Better scoot. First and middle name together? Hustle! Full name? HIDE. *lol*

we loved emma till “friends” got a hold of it. it’s still off my husband’s list because he thinks everyone will take us for ross and rachel fans.

we break a few of your rules. our middle daughter has my name and i have my mom’s name. it has a long history and it wasn’t going to end with me. there’s a slight spelling differentiation between my name and my mom’s, so my daughter was specifically named after my mom, with her spelling. but when i was born, my dad cried and thought i was so beautiful that he wanted to name me after my mom. who can argue with that?!

and we have “punctuation marks,” but only because our names are of a foreign language and that’s just how it works.

our youngest daughter wasn’t officially named till she was five months old. we had narrowed it down, but were still debating when she was born. it became a back burner issue when real life kicked in with three under three and a husband who was always at work. everyone told us “when you see her, you’ll just KNOW,” but that was a crock. i like naming a baby before they’re born (as our oldests were) because you’re used to the name by the time they’re born. our youngest is 13 months and i still have a tough time with her name.

in our irish-welsh family, jack is a nickname. i used to love the name, but it was “short” for john. my husband and i could never use it because i insist that jack be named john, called jack, and he thinks that’s just stupid. cultural differences play a lot into our names.

our oldest has a “just because” name. we picked it out when we were in high school puppy love and it stuck. i don’t like it because it lacks the meaning our other kids’ names have, but my husband loves that her name is “extra special… picked because it was the most beautiful name.”

[There are no more Jennifers in heaven. No matter how you spell it, Jennifer is not an option, quota filled, off the table, gone. Move on.]

That’s my wife’s favorite name. Boo!

Should you decide ahead of time, DO NOT tell people the name you have selected before the baby is born. They will feel very free to wrinkle their nose at it when the baby is still safely unborn.

1. You get a chance to vet anything that you didn’t find in your research.

2. It gives grandmothers a chance to go quilt something with the name.

3. We found that we could have conversations about the child by name, and we liked this, and it helps other children in the home get acclimated more (and it helps “personalize” the baby).

But I wouldn’t have let “I don’t like it” from my in-laws dissuade me, no matter when they found out. It’s not their call. Ever.

queuno–you may think a baby is a baby, but the circumstances of birth, etc, can certainly influence the naming. My son was a very solid guy, so he got a stong name.

Well, my wife is even more forceful about the idea that you give strong names before birth.

Our daughter and our first son’s names were selected before we ever got married — we were talking one time and my wife said “if we ever have a girl, I’d like to name her XYZ”. I liked that name, and suggested a boy’s name. In about 5 minutes, we had agreed on middle names.

So it was pretty easy with our first two children — the names were picked out before they were born.

Our second son has his grandfather’s names. Very cool.

Everyone’s got a preference, but we’ve known of too many “PANIC” names that regretted it later, that we advocate picking names when you’re not rushed or emotional.

And no general authority-style names. First name should be what you intend to use. If the child opts to go with his/her middle name later in life, that’s his call, so you should make sure you give them a name they can use.

And in the case of girls – no fair not giving them a middle name “because they’re going to get married one day anyway”. Sometimes, they don’t.

Oh – one other rule for DW and I – baby names have to be able to have FIRSTNAMELASTNAME.org available.

(j/k)

But all of our children have their own FIRSTNAMELASTNAME.org reserved. For now, they have basic sites. But when they get old enough to have their own web identity, they’ll be grateful.

I had a mission companion from St. George with a girlfriend named “Jan-l”. On her birth certificate. Because the traditional spelling of the name wasn’t sexy enough, I guess.

I’ll take Jennifer any day over Jan-l, Trixie, Honour (what, we’re going to excuse it because of the u?), or Scout.

Excellent suggestions, Nick. Also consider monograms, where the initials are repositioned just slightly.

Jonathan – It’s great that you’re considering names now. Make sure you share those with potential spouses, though.

I had a gf in college who I thought I was going to marry. She told me once that her first girl would be named “Aubrey”. When I paired that with my last name, I gasped at how horrid it sounded, and — no lie — that was the first thought I had that maybe this relationship wouldn’t work out. (It didn’t, but not for that.)

I think it’s a bit kitschy to have all the children with the same initial.

Jonathan–I agree that if you feel strongly about those names, you need to make that known to potential fiances. Had my husband felt strongly about naming the kids after himself and having jr.s or II or III or worse, that really could have been a dealbreaker for me.

Nick–agreed on conception locations. I also know a few.

Queuno–agreed on same initial letters–not a fan.

I also don’t like names of inanimate objects like Brick or Slate or Lexus.

(I am a teacher–I see a lot of names)

I like the name Peter too, but unfortunately it violated one of my rules (the rules being listed on baby announcement thread).

We had some rules that were not unlike yours. We wanted one that was not too common (we looked at the previous year’s baby name list and observed trends), couldn’t be shortened to a nickname for genitals (Richard was out), easy to spell (with one dominant spelling) and not of ambiguous gender. We were fortunate that we both like traditional names. I loved the name Peter, but it wouldn’t work with Porter. And I liked Timothy, but it always made me think of the bridgekeeper in “Monty Python and the Holy Grail:” “There are those who call me….Tim.”

I hadn’t thought before of having a story. Our boy is named after one of the books of the New Testament (hint: not Timothy), and that’s what we tell him. He also has an uncle with the same name, but we didn’t really name him after that uncle.

The name is one that works well for an adult.

Queuno, are you not planning on raising capitalists? Give them a dot com, too!

Eddie–yes, teachers have a hard time naming their own kids.

My own name, Emily, has been on those official lists a lot–being #1 girl name for many years running, but I have infrequently met other Emilys and never had a problem at school. Dodged that bullett.

I was born at 1 pm and the doctor that delivered me told my mom: whatever you do, don’t name her Jennifer–I have delivered 5 today.

So while my name is popular on paper, it is no Jennifer.

Nice post.

This is a fantastic list of things to consider in baby naming. I think just about everything is covered.

One thing that occurred to me as a possible addition that you should not name a child for something that can be consumed, chewed or digested. It’s a little bit disconcerting to hear a child called “Cookie” or “Peaches.”

Also, do not ever pick a moniker that rhymes in any way with the word ‘achoo’ …

Hee hee… came across this blog entirely by accident, but I had to say, I agree with your rules *almost* entirely. I will admit, however, to having one son with a B of M name (albeit not any of the “usual” suspects – he’s not Alma or Helaman or anything), and to choosing my children’s names before birth, though they weren’t set in stone.

I lean toward unusual first names, but that is probably because I was, in fact, named Jennifer – in the early 1970s, no less, and for no good reason – my parents “just liked the sound of it”. Woo. I have also never, however, been drugged for a birth, so I avoid that risk, I suppose, LOL!! And we have a reasonably ordinary last name, so no issue there.

But I agree about unusual spellings, gender neutral names, choosing the latest trend, using meaningful names (and checking the meaning first), family names but NOT the father’s (or mother’s), giving girls middle names (my mom doesn’t have one and always resented that), not sharing names with the nose-crinkling public beforehand, etc, etc.

Too funny!

We named our first kid Jethro.(You can only imagine what our folks had to say about that!)

OTaLN–MacKenzie is indeed an odd duck

danithew–I can’t think of many names that rhyme with “achoo” except maybe PeekaBoo Street (was that her name?) who famously named herself. Also, a bad idea, I say.

jks–good point

Jenn–I am dying to know what your BoM name is. There are some which are less conspicuous: Jacob, Samuel, etc. Do tell….

Seth–good point. I would be happy for my kids to use their middle name and can think of no better name for a professional modern dancer than Arwen.

sharon–I have toyed with the idea of adding Jethro to my boy name potential names list–it fits in my system! So sad when grandma and grandpa don’t get on board, but what are you going to do? They had their chance.

DKL–I am not surprised you would break my rules! Of course, all that matters is that you and your wife agree. Personally, surnames as first names and genderless names are not totally verboten–just that some people don’t consider the implications, so I wanted them to think it through. Good point on geneology. There are girls who like the no middle name thing, and I admit that I like using my maiden a a middle, but I could have easily never been married and then I would have had an incomplete name mocking my singleness.

I’ll add this to the update version:
–never name your kid Boutros!

I think that it is fun for a girl to have a name with at least one i. Upper elementary and middle school girls love to make the dot on the i a smiley face, heart, flower, butterfly etc..

Fun thread! This is a topic near and dear to my heart. My name is Deb, and my brothers married Debbie and Deborah. We decided right off not to do that to the next generation, so our kids have slightly unusual names (okay, maybe more than slightly). I could not look at a child and say “you are precious, you are unique, and there are 4 more of you in every class you will ever attend.”

With each pregnancy (7), we had endless discussions on names, and narrowed it down to a boy and girl name for each. Oddly, our grandchild was named one of the unused-because-of-gender names,and her mother is another one. We wanted a good kid-name (it’s tough to be a 3 year old Philip or Myrtle) but one that would look good on a business card later. “Susie” and “joey” are not easy to be taken seriously. We did want to name a daughter one of those cutsy-ends-with-ee-sound names, so we just bent it into a longer, more adult name,and the name we wanted was her nickname for a few years. I think we did well.

One son hated his 10 letter-name growing up, and used a 5 letter nickname since kindergarten The kids could go to recess after they printed their names,and he quickly noted that he and Stephanie were always last to the playground, while Tom was always first. Now that he is an adult, he insists on using his full and complete first name. Another son was given a name that is somewhat common in the place where husband served a mission, but sounds a little exotic here.

One advice you left off your list; if you are an American, limit your child’s name to no more than 9 letters. On government and school forms, only 9 letters fit. Above-mentioned son was heatedly offended by having the last letter left off, thus making is sound like a feminine name.

Oh, and we avoided celebrity names. I was friends with Moses in college,and he complained mightily about having so much to live up to. Kids have enough pressure…let them be themselves!

Sarah was Sarah before she was conceived. I knew her spirit. The Mellyn, her middle name, I’d chosen from the book “Mistress of Mellyn” by Victoria Holt, that I’d loved as a teenager. Sort of a teenage “Jane Eyre.”

I think I’ve shared this before, but when I was dating my first husband, he was telling me what he was going to name his kids (don’t most 18 year old guys know the names of their kids :)?) and he said his daughter’s middle name was going to be Mellyn. That’s when I knew we were meant for each other. Because how many biker guys already had picked out their daughter’s middle name and it was something obscure from a girl’s romance book.

She always thinks of him as her stepfather.

Oh, I’m rambling.

This is a fun topic, ESO :)

My neighbor named her boys her maiden name as their middle name. And her daughter named her son HER maiden name for his first name. I love that kind of thing.

The problem with not giving girls a middle name is that you are *assuming* that they will marry and take on a new surname. Why not just give them a middle name so that they have one while they’re single and then they can actually have options if they marry?

DW dropped her middle name and retained her maiden name as a middle name. Back in her artist days, she used first-maiden-last. There are a lot of women who drop their maiden names and use their middle names. There are women who don’t change anything.

My sister didn’t have a middle name, and it was a problem for years (she finally married in her mid-30s).

Hee hee good topic made me laugh outright.

So here are my names and justifications…

Arlen – My wife had it in her head that our first born should have an A name. I had to fight for Arlen because she wanted Alma, and as nice as it is in the book of Mormon it is still considered a Girls name to the outside world.

Joshua – popular name that I have liked since I was a kid, yes even before fetus stage…

Owain (welsh spelling of Owen) – named for his welsh great great grandfather and ggg grandfather. Also because I liked the Welsh rogue Prince Owain Glyndwr

Katarina – My wife’s choice, is actually a middle name as her first name is really Bethany (my choice). Though she is often called Kitty, sigh.

Matthew – a name we sort of settled on. Also happens to be the New Testament version of my name, Jonathan.

Rebecca – My 3rd great grandmother from Wales. We battled around on this one for a while because we had a few choices we could not decide until finally fixing on this.

Each of our children (except our first one) have two middle names and it is common for them to be various maiden names or other family names.

And should have added that to our surprise and dismay, Isaac is climbing in the charts– from about 130 on the SSA list when he was born, to about 48 in 2006.

I’m confused about waiting to name your kid until you see him/her. Are the nine months you had to figure it out not enough? Is it just because you work better under pressure?

I used to work in a hospital taking, among other things, newborns and their mothers to their cars, and I have to tell you newborns are the ugliest little things imaginable. What with the misshapen head, the swollen facial features, the placenta residue, the strangely-eerie grey eyes, and the poop that looks like tar, it’s a wonder they endear themselves even to their parents. Why you’d want to choose that particular time to name your baby is beyond me. Maybe if you could wait a month–when they get cute–that would be something, but the SSA makes that it little difficult.

jimbob, my wife and I pick several names that we both agree on, and we don’t decide which one to choose until we meet the baby. Our superstition is that this somehow allows us to choose the name that suits the baby best. Chances are that we’d love the baby no matter what we named her.

I should point out, that I’m thoroughly unromantic when it comes to these things (and have managed to get my wife to sign off on many of my opinions, and she is not easily sold).

This started before we were married, when we were in ZCMI trying to register for silverware (what an utter waste of time for a prospective groom to do — we really don’t care). After silently observing my future wife point to 20 different patterns and say, “well, I like them all”, I drew a tournament bracket and used it to (finally) settle on a winner.

So yes, I like to have ONE first/middle name combination pre-selected for a boy and ONE for a girl before they arrive. I guess with only three children, it wasn’t that big of a deal anyway.

DW has commented that she doesn’t particularly care for the middle name of our third as an isolated name (our second son) — but paired with his first name it’s a good name (we used the names of the maternal grandfather and paternal grandfather as first and middle names).

My wife wanted to go with her father’s first name and then her maiden name as a middle name. The trouble is that for the rest of his life, people would have assumed that we named our son as an homage to a former president of the United States, not her father. So her dad got top billing and my dad got the middle and last names.

Great post. Mormon names, one of my favorite topics. Thanks to the comment for the link to Normal Mormon Husbands (mormonhusbands.blogspot.com) with the scoring system to help solve some of these issues. Hilarious!

Wasn’t Kaiser Wilhelm the emperor of Germany during World War I?

That’s an interesting choice.

I am a week overdue, we have yet to choose a name and this post is hilarious. Take a look at http://www.babynamewizard.com; the name voyager thing charts popularity and there are funny blurbs about each name. We picked up the book a while ago and it still gives me the giggles. When you look up Jennifer, it says something like “Hi, Jennifer! Looking up your name? Jennifer is the most popular name for mothers right now.”

Awesome.

Jennifer is the most popular name for mothers right now.

Because it was the most popular name in the 70s, and now they are all having children?

I pretty much appreciate everything you had to say. My last name is 10 letters long and very foreign, but sadly I am discontent with my first name. Do you know how many Jessica’s there are in America? Let me give you a hint: In my 11th grade English class there were 5 Jessicas, and 2 of us were Jessica W. I was supposed to be named Jennifer (and at this point I know about… one Jennifer and 20 Jessicas, so I wouldn’t have minded being named that), but my mom was very sick when I was born, and so the nurse named me… apparently all she could remember was that it started with a “j”. Go figure. That’s ok, it’s kind of an amusing story.

Also, I have a couple of names picked out, but they are mostly just middle names. I think it would be neat to be named after some one, and I love some of the names of my ancestors (and they are all “normal” names). Do you have an opinion on using older names? Things that aren’t “hip.” (Louisa, Elizabeth, Samantha)…

By the way, here’s a report on the most popular names in Texas:

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/052208dnmetnames.1561a7a6.html

Any question what impact immigration (of any variety) is having on Texas? Look at 1 and 5 on the boys’ list.