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| Thursday, May 23, 2013 |
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Fasting. That’s what I did, which by all definitions of the word was the most backwards thing I could have tried. Similar to you, my swearing was usually out of impatience or frustration. I have problems with my blood sugar, which usually escalates my temptation to swear. The idea that fasting would help me with my swearing was nonsense on paper. But it worked. Within the first day, I saw a dramatic difference not only in my language, but in my feelings towards the things that were upsetting me. Within a few days, I would only have an occasional mishap. Ever since then, it hasn’t been a problem. |
Paradox – good to know. Perhaps I should try that as meditation and NPR don’t seem to work… |
Downplay its badness and justify its use (“it’s okay if it’s for comedy!” etc.) Works like a charm for me. |
For me, the problem of swearing is like the proverbial big fish that swims into your mind. Attack it and it multiplies. Ignore it and it blithely swims away. That being said, I’ve always enjoyed a good curse word. |
My dad always came up with curses that were so funny that we laughed — ratza-fratzen-fricken-looper-razna-ritch! was one of his favorites. I think he trained himself to say things like that when we kids got old enough to notice, and our laughter was enough of a reward for him to replace his older words with these. Most of the time. Not always. The exceptions were memorable. |
If in heaven, we are divided into ” Last Words Before You died in a Horrible Accident Club”; ya’ll will find me in the “Oh Sh*t! Club”. I hate that word. I do not know why it comes out of my mouth, just before I think I am about to be squashed by a semi. Congratulations Devyn for showing such restraint. That would have been my d*mn it all to h*ll moment. |
My tongue becomes unbridled when I’m playing video games alone. I’m otherwise in complete control of my mount, even in frustrating or painful situations. I’m not sure why video games bring it out in me. Not sure the best way to prevent the off remark. I guess you could practice. Whack your thumb with a hammer and practice saying “dang it.” |
I meant to type “mouth,” not “mount.” Although I can also control my horse. |
As far as I can tell, there is only one set of words–those involving the names of God–we are asked not to use vainly. Everything else falls under the category of social wrongs. So if you want to stop swearing, by all means do so, but don’t do it because of any perceived religious constraint. |
Most of the time, those around me would never believe I cuss like a truck driver. Most of the time, they think I’m a fairly reserved and nice lady. I don’t look like somebody who cusses like a truck driver; I don’t dress like somebody who cusses like a truck driver; my speech, most of the time, is fairly refined and my voice is low and cultured. My family and friends, of course, are not stunned and amazed when my alternate personality emerges (I’m assuming you guys are in that category) because they’ve become used to it. Most of the time, I control myself. I don’t curse in 99% of my normal interactions. It’s that 1% when I go all Tourette’s on people. I don’t hate myself for it like I used to; I don’t cuss for gratuitous reasons, sometimes the curse word is just more fitting descriptively; other times, crap just flows out of my mouth. And those who previously thought I was all cultured and nice are traumatized. Bill never cusses. Never. Well, once in a blue moon and then it shocks us all. It even shocks him. My neighbor across the street, a quiet humble man, who is now the patriarch, was our bishop for years and years. My James played with his kids—they were all like family. He looked up to my neighbor and he was a father figure to James. He came home laughing his head off one day because some birds had made a nest inside John’s chimney and John had put a ladder up to the chimney to run the birds out and they were all flying in his face and boy, John let loose some choice words. The kids were all standing around watching the bishop try to chase these birds out of his home and out of his face and cussing them to beat the band. I don’t think anybody was permanently scarred by the experience. Except John. Who I remind every once in awhile. I’m good that way. |
Re: “My family and friends, of course, are not stunned and amazed when my alternate personality emerges (I’m assuming you guys are in that category) because they’ve become used to it.” So, annegb, if we’re in the category of your friends who wouldn’t be stunned, why not go ahead and show us a little side of your truck driver personality? C’mon! I guess what I’m driving at is, do you really ever go over the edge and say any of the REALLY BAD ONES? Enquiring minds need to know. |
While driving, the day after I got home from my mission, someone almost hit me while they were changing lanes. I said “Oh H*ll, Oh He*l” I then remembered that a nine year old and an eleven year old were in the car with me. I quickly ruined the idea of their amazing big brother, the perfect RM. |
Most of the time, those around me would never believe I cuss like a truck driver. Most of the time, they think I’m a fairly reserved and nice lady. I was wondering what you would say in this thread. Hope you are well. |
Earlier tonight while picking up my daughter from Mutual I struck up a conversation with another waiting father. A couple of days ago I had jokingly, so I thought, said to this the same guy my family does not observe evil holidays like Halloween. He doesn’t know me well enough to know I was only kidding and asked me about it tonight. My immediate response to his question of “You really aren’t skipping Halloween are you?” was “Hell no.” I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his head. I don’t think he heard the rest of my answer. I just redefine what a cussword is. To me “hell” and “damn” aren’t cuss words. I can’t get my wife to agree, but she tolerates me. In South Africa they aren’t considered cuss words and when our family visited there last year my 15 year old son quickly incorporated them into his vocabulary-to great comic effect I might add. It sure was funny to listen to him say in terribly exagerated tones “What the hell is that?” or “Damn, that’s [insert object].” He had to drop the words the moment our return flight lifted off of South African soil. To his credit, he stopped. I am not so fortunate. It was funny while it lasted. |
But, rbc, I read here on the bloggernacle that “crap” is a bad word in South Africa. There’s another one, but I can’t remember. My parents used terrible language, all the time. They called each other vile names and every day, every day, took the Lord’s name in vain. By the time I was eight, I would say “Jesus Christ” if I stubbed my toe. I tried very hard to stop that when I was taught it was wrong. You guys pretty much have heard my cussing vocabulary. But when I get really really mad, words just pour out of me. I always feel terrible afterwards. Cussing is a very hard habit to break. We had my nephew and his girlfriend to dinner Sunday and she kept saying “Jesus!” and “God.” I’m not comfortable with that kind of cussing at all. I don’t like the constant use of the “f” word—noun, verb, adjective, etc. Whenever I get really mad, and, oh crap, I’ll admit it—it’s at Bill—and use that kind of language, I always feel just awful, just awful. Especially I beg the Lord for forgiveness. I remember this one time a bunch of us met at the church for a scout project and the Relief Society president was there and things were a mess and she said, “shit!” loudly and began to clean up and I smiled a little smile and helped her. Sometimes…… But one time I said “hell” and “damn” in a letter to Orrin Hatch and he never spoke to me again. |
3. Rusty – so take the J Golden Kimball approach… 4. Hunter – sometimes a good curse word is very descriptive and is apt. However, you are correct that fighting it hard seems to cause more swearing. 5. Ardis Parshall – now that is an interesting approach.. 6. JA Benson – not sure it was restraint on my part as I don’t think I had much opportunity to think, just reacted… 7. Jota G – video games… Another reason I don’t play those 9. jimbob – now that is interesting – social wrongs – does that mean that they are not wrong? I think the loss of control is the issue not necessarily what we say. 10. annegb – you are a gem – I love your stories. 12. Tex – well they learned you were still human :) 14. rbc – I would love to have you in my ward :) |
“Crap” may be a bad word in South Africa, I don’t recall. I also learned through my 9 year old daughter the word “stuffed” is considered extremely vulgar-tantamount to the F word here. After a large barbeque/braai she proudly declared she was “stuffed.” The hosts were not impressed and we’re probably thought of as vulgar Americans-not too much of a stretch I might add. Funny how it was an innocent comment from my 9 year old daughter instead of the intentional “swearing” of my 15 year old son that elicited the “tsk-tsks” from the South African hosts, at least the uptight and judgmental South African hosts. Thus, it is all situational or relative and, except for taking the Lord’s name in vain, there really is no such thing as swearing. It’s just a matter of how offended the *hearer* of the word(s) chooses to be. |
jimbob – The lawyer in me likes your approach, but the priests quorum advisor in me isn’t quite so sure. |
As part of a college project, I associated with some Navy chief petty officers (CPOs) for a while. I thought I knew how to cuss until I heard them. They made it an art form. |
