“Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater” is one of the few statements that gets on my nerves every time it is said.

Here’s why:

1) No one said you can’t take the baby out and replace the bathwater. Converts do this all the time when taking things they hold dear and blending it in with their new faith.

2) What if the bathwater is black and you can no longer see the baby? Wouldn’t it then be logical to throw the bathwater and the baby out in order to find said baby? With people who leave the church and then come back (though I suspect the vast majority who leave do not come back), surely this method has some success in recovering the baby.

3) Thanks to modern tub (or sink, depending on how old your baby is) drains it is impossible to lose your baby while removing the bathwater. Yes most of the world does not share this technology, but most of the world is not sharing this phrase amongst each other either.

4) What if the baby drowned? Why are you caring for a decaying body?

5) Now this might be a stretch, but what if you like the bathwater more than you like the baby? I think this is what is called a “Jack Mormon”, some one who doesn’t believe what is being taught but enjoys the benefits of membership.

I suggest instead we share a different message of encouragement:

“I understand what you’re going through. Faith crisis do happen, and they take time to figure out. If you want a listening ear, I’m here for you.”

If you’ve never experienced a faith crisis (or find the previous statement too long):

“I’m here for you.”